Comedy

Reasons I enjoy sharing a wall with a dumb lax bro

We all know lax bros are…well…lax bros. They do things that make all of us scratch our heads a little.

Here are a few things I’m confused about:

  • WHO are you on the phone with?
  • WHY is she ok with this conversation?
  • HOW is someone this slutty?

First of all, I must tell you that I am drunk on wine and am generally OK with telling people exactly how I feel right now.

Violated.

I wish there were an HR department I could call.

Let me tell you a few things I just had to endure listening to while innocently searching for a RomCom on Netflix:

  • “Why don’t you just sit on my face?”
  • “I’ll supply all the liquor”
  • “Drunken dance off”
  • “Let’s make out”
  • “You look soooooo good in that shirt”
  • “Ohh yeah look at that girl. You look really good in that Facebook picture”
  • “Ya call me back so I can hear that voice”

Can someone just kill me? Or better yet – just inject dumb into my brain. Oh wait, too late.

Someone please help the lax bros of the world. Hand them a book. Don’t have sex with them. And for fuck’s sake, please don’t reproduce.

Advertisements
Standard
Lyon, Travel

Lyon: One Euro Beers

23/7/2012

Today during the day was incredibly typical (class, lunch, etc.) but the evening on the day of one euro beer night is what I really want to talk about. 

We went to Cosmopolitan Bar on our last Monday in Lyon. It’s kind of funny that they have the awesome booze deal on a Monday, right? It was ridiculous. We walked in to a completely jam-packed bar and I immediately got a drink. Then we all found a place to stand and I got two drinks. Basically, I had three cups of beer in a 10 minute span. Good idea? I think not. 

This picture sums up the night well…

As hilarious as that was, what ensued was even more out of control. The guy on our trip that no one expected to get any managed to start making out with a girl, follow her to the smoking room and continue to suck face with her for about 20 minutes, and this started only 20 minutes after arriving.

Then the girl we least expected to hook up, or even drink, on this trip immediately asked for a beer (which I happily delivered) and a man to dance with (which I also happily delivered). Why am I so good?She and one of the guys she danced with ended up exchanging phone numbers and going on several dates, eventually leading to a potential relationship.

Matchmaker, matchmaker make me a match…

Au revoir (for now)

Standard